Monday, June 13, 2011

A shocking revelation...

My retarded side...  is retarded!


Where are all of her internal organs?  No really, where?

Against what everyone else seemed to think was my better judgement, I grappled tonight with a broken finger.  I wore my split, taped it up, and then wrapped my entire hand in an ace bandage.  I wanted to make sure it was as protected as I could get it.

Surprisingly, it didn't bother me.  I thought maybe the jostling and jolting may have been irritating, but it was fine.  I mean, I was also on kid duty tonight, so that may have played a factor.  50 pound 8 year olds can't really jolt me around.  (I did roll with Allie too, but she was more afraid for my hand then I was, so she had her kid gloves on with me.  =)  Thanks, Allie.)

Anyway, my point.

My right hand is the injured one, so I had to do everything lefty.  And omg, do I ever suck as a left handed grappler.  I know it is normal to have a retarded side, and everyone has one, but dang, is my retarded side ever retarded.  I don't think I did anything right on the first try during drilling, at all.  It was kind of frustrating, but I suppose in the long run working my retarded side is a good thing.

Oh, and have I offended anyone yet with my choice of non politically correct term?  Sorry, but the left side of my body is characterized by retardation.  It shows slowness and limitation in ability and development.  I suppose I could use the PC term, and say my left side is differently abled than my right, but saying my differenly abled side is differenly abled doesn't have the same ring to it.

Anyway!  To sum it all up...  I grappled with a broken finger, it didn't hurt, but I sucked. Bad.

The end!


  1. Where are all of her internal organs? No really, where?
    I think they are stuffed in her bra.

  2. If it makes you feel any better, I've been training with a broken rib. Doctor said no training for 4-6 wks. Week 2 came and went and I was feeling caged, so I hit the mats. I'm learning how to do things from the opposite side to keep the pressure off the injury. One thing I learned is folks are not used to techniques coming from the wrong side. Have had more luck trying things out.

  3. Hahaha, great minds think alike Kitsune, I had that exact same thought! ;)

    I can't do anything with my left side either, Stephanie. To make it fair, I think your grappling partners should have to wear mittens when they fight you!

  4. @Savage and Gina - Can we do that? I would gladly shove an organ or two into my bra to have a remotely feminine looking silhouette. hehehe! =)

    @Anon - My first real injury was a broken rib. I too only lasted two weeks on the side lines, and I was a pouty baby about it. It was pretty early on in my Jiu-jitsu career, and it had a lasting effect on my entire game. I played a lot of guard in an attempt to protect myself, and still, my guard is my happy place. Feel better, my friend!

  5. Ouch! I've had so many injuries and ailments on my right side this past year that I ended up grappling left handed for nine months. When everything was finally better, my training partner had to tell me to use both hands! Welcome to the one arm bandit club. I hope your finger heals fast. BTW, is that your middle finger? ;-)

  6. It IS my middle finger. I have been showing people all week which finger that is broken... LOL ... And when they complain, I just inform them, that it is medically necessary for me to flip them the bird at all times. =)

  7. Something got shoved into MY bra when I had two kids. Then everything sagged. Now it looks like my "internal organs" are around my belly button.
    God bless the Underwire.

  8. God bless the underwire indeed!