BJJ hair for Women III

I've blogged before about how I wear when I grapple, and how I went from having waist length hair to almost almost no hair at all over the course of my training, and how BJJ is brutal on hair.  You have to wash it constantly, and it gets pulled out, ripped and damaged pretty much the whole time you are grappling.

And while I have found the best way to keep MY hair our of my face and from getting stuck under people's butts and knees (Though its getting long, so I am going to have to figure something else out.) I hadn't yet figured out how to keep my hair from looking and feeling like I abuse it.

On top of abusing my hair in BJJ, I also abuse my hair off the mat.  I have curly awful unruly hair, and if I don't want to look like I am in a constant state of bedhead, I have to straighten my hair every time I wash it, and I bleach and recolor my hair every 4-6 weeks.  I think you'd be hard pressed to find anyone who is as mean to their hair as I am.

And after four years I have finally found a shampoo and conditioner that actually makes my hair feel and look less damaged than it is.   Honestly, I don't know if it actually does repair my hair, but it certainly feels like it does.  Plus, it smells good.

John Frieda Full Repair shampoo and conditioner is amazing.  

Soap Box: Mean Girls

I am going to soap box today... Sorry.  Girl-Jitsu, LLC posted an article recently.  It was submitted by a reader, and does not reflect the opinion of Girl-Jitsu... that being said, the article touched on essentially my biggest pet peeve in BJJ.  Women who are condescending and mean to the other girls on their team. 

That. Is. Bullshit.  

It is hard enough to be a woman on the mat without the few other women bullying you and making you feel unwelcome.

I think we as women are taught from a young age to compare ourselves to other women.  Am I prettier? Am I smarter? Are my shoes cuter?  If no, then point out all the things that make you better than that girl.  Not to mention how we are basically shown what we need to look and act like by society, and God forbid we fall short of what we are very clearly told what is good enough and what isn't.  

That in and of itself is crap as well, but I won't go off on that tangent.

When it comes to BJJ, we as women have to make ourselves VERY vulnerable to train.  We have to put our heart, soul, sweat and tears into our training... in a room full of men who are climbing all over us, and kicking our asses.  Literally.

It is hard.  It can suck a very large amount.  But I feel like BJJ is the common ground we all as women need.  It is the great equalizer.  We can, should, and need to put all the petty female rivalry we were born into behind us.  Use BJJ to help lift each other up for a change.  Support each other.  Be there for each other.  

BJJ has changed my life in such a dramatic astounding way, and brings me so much joy and happiness I want more than anything to share that with the other people, and especially the women in my life.  I want everyone to have access to the wonderful world of BJJ.  I would never in a million years try to squeeze someone out because I didn't like her, was jealous, or because I didn't like her personality. 

BJJ is so more than that.  

So, stop it.  Stop being mean.  Stop being condescending.  Just stop.  Appreciate each other for what you are.  Thank them for being there for you to train with.  They are walking down a similar arduous path.  BJJ is hard... and while their journey may be different than yours, know they too, have similar struggles.  Other women are going to be the only ones who know what it's like to be smaller and weaker than a man.  It is a frustrating thing to always be weaker, and capable of being overpowered   Most men won't know what it's like.  They won't understand when it makes you cry... But your female teammate will.  You can be immensely powerful tools to each other, but just as just as immensely defeating.  Don't be that girl.

I am not saying you have to be BFFs with every girl that walks in the door, but while you share the mat with them, treat them them the way you would want someone to treat your sister, or your daughter or your mom.

Pan Ams 2013 and Tattoos

Fabio competed again this year and brought home another medal!  Congrats Fabio!  Always proud to be one of his students.

I watched online, and serious props to Budo Videos.  Their multimat technology kicked ass.  I saw every single matched I wanted to see.  Absolutely worth it this year... my only request would be they have the scores on the screen for all the matches, not just the adult male finals... which by the way, were amazing.  Caio Terra is probably my favorite grappler, so I always enjoy watching him grapple... Third gold at the Pans in a row! Woohoo!

I would watch the Pan Ams online next year, but I'm going instead. Woohoo! I've wanted to go the past two years, but I am tried of just wanting to go.  I'm going.  I've already got it worked out.  So, 2014 Pan Ams.. I will see you there! =D

I am also doing the Miami Open in six months.  So, it works it self out perfectly.  Miami is in 6 months, and the Pan Ams are six months after that.  I'll have plenty of time before each to give my body rest, then kick my own ass training.

And speaking of rest.. .that is what I am doing now.  I am in the middle of a one month break.  My knee is being lame and I would like it to fully recover before I start competition training.  The break perfectly coincided with tattoo time as well.  So my arm and knee can heal at the same time.  Multi tasking for the win.

Sean Williams, my tattoo artist is all sorts of awesome as you can tell.

www.CollectiveTattoo.com

This tattoo is finished, but in all likelihood this will become a half sleeve.

Thank you for being trustworthy.

My team has an unusual number of women on it.  We have at least a dozen women who train regularly.

But that still leaves us out numbered over 20 to 1 when it comes to our male teammates.

Training BJJ was actually a little difficult for me in the beginning.  If I was not instantly obsessed, I don't think I would have kept training.  I have trust issues as well as personal space issues (Well, HAD personal space issues.  BJJ fixed that.) but to train BJJ I had to blindly trust that these essential strangers, who were climbing all over my body, were doing so with good intentions.

Three years in and they have all proven their intentions to be pure... at least in the way that they are only trying to do me bodily harm.  =)

Sadly, with the Lloyd Irving horror story unraveling, I realize more and and more that, that is not always the case. 

So, thank you Team Fabio Novaes for being decent, upstanding human beings.  Thank you for not letting my trust be misplaced.  I feel blessed to be part of this team and thankful to have my teammates, male and female in my life.

Trust is not something I give lightly, or easily so it means more than I can express that I have a place where I can let my guard down, and still feel safe.

Happy Valentines Day!

Choke someone with love today!

Woohoo!

Tonight I got my second stripe!

And like I always, I am happy Fabio thinks I deserves a stripe, and decidedly against receiving said stripe.

One of my favorite training partners got a stripe too, and in all honesty I am happier for her than for myself.  I love her to death, and she totally 100% deserves it! 

Erica America!! 

Jimmy, one of my good friends, got his first stripe as a purple belt tonight as well.  Congrats Jimmy!  Well deserved!  ....and then we made him an honorary girl and included him in our post class excessive picture taking.

You make a lovely lady, Jimmy.  Hope it wasn't too awkward for you!  haha =) 

And I still fail at the whole being serious portion of Brazilian Jiu-jitsu.  Good thing Fabio doesn't seem to care.

And congrats to Eddie, Cruz, Little Cruz, Gary x2, and Raul!

Vacation: Over

We went up to the mountains for Christmas this year.  

My kids saw snow for the first time!  They were very excited... as you can see here.  The look on her face is priceless.

It rained two days we were there.  I am told one of the storms we got was considered a blizzard, even though there was no snow, but I don't claim to know anything about real winter weather.  I was cool though, and pretty.  We were in a really, REALLY rural area and you could hear the wind coming.. snapping branches as it came.  It sounded like a giant was storming through the woods.  

This fire place was the soul source of heat for the entire house.  Which meant we had to chop wood everyday if we didn't want to freeze to death.  (And yes, I was on vacation   I had whipped cream on my coffee.  It's freaking delicious.)

 I learned to chop firewood! I am told I stand wrong, but I'd rather stand wrong than lop my foot off.  Fair trade I think.  Plus, the wood still gets chopped in half even if I stand like an idiot.  And Zaile being my little mini me had to give it a try too.  I helped her chop the ax a few times, and then staged this picture for her.  She loved it.

I loved this little winding road that lead up to our cabin.  And mountain driving is a trip.  Its like a roller coaster in which you can fly off the track and die, and a lot of the roads we had to drive down were essentially one lane.  I took a wrong turn once, and ended up having to drive down BACKWARDS, because there was no where for me to make a turn.  Insanity.  

This was the first morning it snowed.  It was also the first day the sun broke through the clouds in three days.  This picture doesn't capture it AT ALL, but it was snowing when I took this, and all the little snow flakes caught the sunlight and it looked like it was raining white glitter.  It was one of the most beautiful things I'd ever seen.  That, and I desperately missed the sunshine.  I could never live somewhere that wasn't generally sunny.

This is my niece.  I got to spend a lot of time with her while we were up there too.  She and my other nieces and nephews are fantastic kids, and I wish we lived closer.  I miss them so much!

I took these on my snow adventure.  You non Floridians may not as been overly impressed with snow and frozen water as I was... but I never see it.  I'll spare you the 300 other pictures of snow I took.

We went snow tubing down the side of a mountain too.  It was a lot of fun, and also terrifying and painful.  I almost always had to go down with a kid in my lap... and we weren't sliding down snow.. we were sliding down ice.  My butt was sad about it.

This is what I got for Christmas!  Yay!  

This was me New Year's Eve.  We spent it at Disney World like we do every year.  

Happy New Year Everyone!  I hope your 2013 kicks ass!